share the LOVE by putting yourself first

Every time I read an article about tips and advice on relationships, it’s always the same thing. “Be yourself, listen, be tolerant, be considerate, communicate, go for dinners, travel together, and find out what each other want”. “Do fun things together!” Great advice but does it really works?

The rules are same, no matter the culture, the nation and the continent.  From the real life stories I’ve heard people would say; ‘I was considerate with my partner, we use to talk, we were sync together, and we had a lot in common’.  Men and women say the same things ‘but something went wrong; it didn’t work out in the end’. What did go wrong?

When you follow all the rules, when it goes wrong? What do you do? Do you go to a shrink, do you cry for help from friends and family, does it work when they say it’s going to be okay? Do you just go for a rebound trip? Is time going to heal this pain?  How long is this time, when do you finally get over it?

From a lot of heart break stories; awards given to heartbreak; nine in ten people will be nominated for the best heart break awards.

Is it that you were concentrating on the other person too much, did you overdo the caring? Was it too much to handle and was he/she with you because of your availability?

Where I come from, no shrinks to help; you just need to deal with it without any professional help. Our great grand parents did, our grannies did, and our parents are doing it. They are in relationships that’s messed up and it becomes a routine. And they advised us to do the same.

Someone once asked me, “What is your greatest fear?” My greatest fear is ‘people’. I don’t fear ghost, horror movies, cults and all the myths out there, I fear people because they are so unpredictable.  People can be capable of anything, they can be angels and at same time demons. That’s what happens in relationships, people just become either demons or angels and mess it up from what had been.

This is the fabulous deal about relationships… never be surprised at what people are capable of doing. Riri says; “even angels have their wicked schemes and you take that to new extremes” (LOUD album).

Well I would say this ‘put you first’. People are not easy to love.

At that point when your happiness falls into place, you are capable of sharing the LOVE to another. You cannot make someone feel you love them, if you are unlovable, unhappy with no smile. Get your happiness and your love will be transferable.

xoxo